Title: Spock's Logs 15
Author: Istannor
Series: TOS
Part: 1/1
Rating: [PG13]
Codes:
Summary: Lt. Commander Spock is tested.

Disclaimer: These are the characters of Paramount and
Viacom. They own them. I only check 'em out from the library.
I promise to bring 'em back.
Spock's Logs


Stardate: Date not given


I am at a loss to describe today's occurrence. We were 2.45
days out from our rendezvous with the Aphrodite. We picked
up in Ambassadorial party en route to Starbase 9. They were
to meet an outbound transport there and we were scheduled
for a three-day leave after we dropped them off.

The Aphrodite was heading out to patrol the Tholian
/Federation border and would not be passing anywhere near
Starbase 9. The request for transport was logical. That is
where logic ended.

This log is fully encrypted. I do not expect anyone to be able
to decipher it unless I release the key. I shall not do so until
after the deaths of both James Kirk and myself. Too many
mysteries have manifested recently.

It would be logical to inform Starfleet of what passed between
the Ambassador, my Captain, and myself today. However, I
cannot bring myself to take such an action. It is not
cowardice, instead my reluctance is based on a conviction
that my Captain would never willingly betray the Federation,
or Starfleet. My surety is absolute in this regard. I recognize
there's no logic to that statement and I accept that as being a
condition of my existence. Some things are not logical, yet
they are true.

Ambassador Jean Little is a figure who is well known to me,
if only by reputation. My father has always spoken highly of
her. He has worked with her during several negotiations and
described her as preternaturally calm, thoughtful, and brilliant.
This particular level of praise from my father is equivalent to a
Human screaming out an ecstatic cry of acceptance. I looked
forward to meeting her one day. It  was rather unexpected to
find that the unnamed Ambassador we were scheduled to
transport was that same Jean Little.

I should have not been surprised that she and my Captain are
connected, yet I was. It was immediately obvious to me that
Jim knew her, though he did not announce it. Rather, he
made a show of nonchalance surrounding her arrival.
However, I could not fail to notice Jim tense and a faint acrid
smell reached me from his direction. Jim gives off a slight
odor, unnoticeable to humans, when he is nervous or
frightened. I rarely smell it; I smelled it today. She frightened
him, but he suppressed the fear and the smell vanished
immediately.

I thought she was perceived as a threat by him, to him. I was
only partially correct. She actually was a threat to us all. I'm
quite sure she was prepared to kill Jim, myself, and McCoy if
need be. It seems were all tested in some way. Evidently we
passed; since we still live.

I was in my cabin reviewing data from the latest experiments
we were conducting in Science Lab 4, when I heard my
Captain yell out my name. I was startled but I did not stop to
think how I could have heard his voice through the wall, I
simply ran through our connecting bathroom into his cabin.

Immediately, I saw a figure bent slightly over Jim, with their
hands on each of his shoulders. I could not tell who the figure
was, but I could see Jim. He was arched back with his eyes
closed and his mouth opened in a silent scream. Pain, fear,
power, joy, all those things filled the air, the most prominent
was pain.

I will not attempt to deny my reactions to the sight of my
Captain being attacked. It was fully Vulcan and  the reason
why Surak had to walk amongst us to set us free. I meant to
destroy the threat utterly and completely. There was no
hesitation or questioning of my state of mind. I am not certain
that one can say I had any emotions associated with my
decision. What I had was sure knowledge of what I was
called to do. I sought to slay that which threatened what was
mine.

Perhaps I should explain my choice of terminology. James
Kirk is claimed by me in the manner of Vulcan. Having
pledged my loyalty and friendship, he belongs to me. His
continued well-being is my responsibility and the evidence of
my honor remaining unblemished.

I moved at full Vulcan speed and reached out to lift the
intruder and toss them aside. I grabbed both shoulders and
lifted.

Nothing happened.

It was as if I had attempted to move a mountain. This should
have alerted me and caused me to re-evaluate the situation.
Under normal circumstances I would have done so quickly
and efficiently. I felt no need for introspection. I wished to
destroy the threat. This single-minded drive to slay should
also have caused me pause. It is nothing I have ever
experienced before. I have read about it in discussions on
Vulcan military tradition and history. It is called the
da'Niikhirch, or the eye of fire, it is rare now because so few
Vulcans pledge fealty.

Each clan has a cadre of kali t'zaled, who have all pledged to
enter the eye of the fire to protect Vulcan. It is they who would
serve Vulcan's flame one day. I did not expect to be
numbered among them. It is apparent I will have no choice in
this regard; I am kali t'zaled and I have felt the eye of fire.

I digress; that is an unforgivable lapse.

I became more determined to destroy this threat. Jim was in
agony. I knew this to be true. I moved around to the side of
the figure and grabbed both arms and pulled with all of my
might. This finally freed Jim. I then pulled back my fist to strike
the hooded figure... that is when I heard Jim yell at me to
stop. I hesitated briefly, but I felt it was imperative to complete
my task. Jim must have sensed this because he reached up
and grabbed at me. He missed and fell to the floor, too weak
to rise. I turned immediately to assist him with one eye on the
intruder.

He gasped out, "Spock, that's Ambassador Little. She's my
cousin. It's okay. She's doing what she has to do. I'll be fine.
Don't hit her."

I turned abruptly to see the intruder suddenly revealed. I have
no idea how my vision could have been so clouded that I
mistook her for a stranger.

I helped Jim to sit up on his bunk. My mind was once again
clear of the eye of fire, but now I was filled with questions.
That is when McCoy entered.

He, of course, demanded to know what was happening. Even
mind blind as he is, he could sense the violence and pain in
the air. Ambassador Little's response was totally
unexpected. She turned and smiled at McCoy. Then she
announced that we both would do nicely. McCoy and I stood
rooted to our places while she calmly exited the cabin.

I immediately asked Jim what this meant. I demanded to
know who Jean Little was, in reality. Unfortunately, he was too
exhausted and ill to answer. He began to have projectile
vomiting and we rushed into the fresher. After he was
finished, I helped him back to his bunk. All he could say in
response was: "She is Chosen, an Old One. She wasn't
hurting me...testing me. Making sure I was still sane...not  a
danger. I didn't call Bones, I didn't call you, Spock. I Needed
you. You both came. We succeeded.  I live." He lost
consciousness.

I have no intention of allowing Jean Little to damage James
Kirk. She may be his cousin, but I am his friend. I will go
speak with Ambassador Little. She will answer my questions
to my satisfaction. She will assure me that she intends no
further threat to my Captain.

I will not contemplate failing this charge.